Which Ear Is Your Favourite?

Clarice Starling

16 Ericson Place

New York

Dr W Graham

935 Pennsylvania Avenue,

NW Washington,

D.C. 20535-0001 

Dear Uncle Will,

Just a quick note as I had to say thank you for such an interesting, and, let's face it, memorable Christmas experience.

We will be picking up Aunty Margo from the psyche ward in a couple of weeks, they say the fits have stopped now and she just has an infrequent bout of running into small corners, but, even that little tick is fading. Tony is still playing with the present you bought him, and vehemently disagrees with Aunt Isabella stating clearly that you are never too young for a Bowie knife. He can't wait till his 6th birthday now!

I have to apologise for my husband, John can be a bit of an old stick in the mud when it comes to his food. Personally I think his outrage was over the top and, well, to be honest, downright rude. Who would have thought such an uproar over low carb eating was even possible, but, I suppose some of us are up for shaking things up and some just don't have the guts for it.

Whilst writing, I have to ask, what happened to that lovely Israeli woman Zissel? What a knowledge on fungi she was everything from ink caps to Jews ear (oh the irony). When I got to your house we hit it off like a house on fire, then she went all silly when your chef came in (turns out it was her ex lover). The next thing you know she's gone without even a by your leave and only a couple of hours before dinner, leaving me happily chatting with him. I must admit Hans was incredibly suave to the point of immaculate, the way he licked his lips when he looked at me was a little unsettling and an ego boost all at the same time. It did little to lift John's spirits.

Now to that meal. Such a vast array of cuts of meat as I have ever seen. Hans explained that he had got a fresh long pig. This threw me a tad as I am more of the understanding pigs are fattened not lengthened buy hey ho. It was indeed at this point that Aunty Margo had her funny turn, silly woman.

You were such a dear asking which ear I favoured, thank you so much for remembering the troubles I have had with infections from that damned municipal pool. Sitting me at the top left was inspired. However, I must admit, my favourite ear was the Jews Ear served with dinner, how Hans laughed when I said it really did bear a resemblence. Luch was rather on my side I feel as it seemed only myself and Aunty Christie got one.

Anyway my dear I must dash as a gorgeous bottle of Chiante has just arrived from Dr Lecter, or Hans as us friends say. John is running rather late and I will be furious if Hannibal is upset by his rude behaviour again visa vie low carb dieting. It would serve him right if we are finished eating before he gets home, just deserts Hannibal quipped earlier!

Until next years gathering I shall love you and leave you.

Clarice

x x