Why I Hate Purple

Why I Hate Purple

Inter planetary space hopping is my daily grind. One alien sphere to the next selling my wares. Trinkets from the old town of Yargul bought for a handful of yogs, sold to the artisans of the Joshka city for my body weight in yogs.

Some days it feels as my trade is more akin to theft than merchandising. To be honest some days it actually is. Thieving from the pockets of these self bloated ego's with more money than pools of water on the Oceanic planet. They desire it, I find it and let's face it, I have a mouth and a hungry space carrier to feed. I also have Traj, without who's help (and swift knife work) I would be a fool to travel without. He is my bodyguard and my closest friend. We have circumnavigated most of this galaxy together over the years selling, buying, sometimes stealing and occasionally unladen the dead of their unnecessary vestiges. Well, you can't take it with you when you're dead so we just sell it on.

Life is sweet, now and then violent and in the whorehouses of Nriall, pleasurably exhausting. We have enough money to buy the food, the goods and the women that take our fancy. It is, for the most part, a great life only ever despoiled by one thing. This one thing is without question forefront in the vanguard of annoyances. This one thing puts the kibosh on many ventures Traj and I put up there at the top of our list of 'Desires For Life'. It is the one thing that barricades our way to riches galore selling certain wares that are smoked in the subterranean clubs in Margal, but banished everywhere else. It would be (if they caught us) the noose around our necks (quite literally) from our little sojourn where we borrowed (and later sold to a very happy miscreant) the then jewel of Tharguss's Space Fleet. The very sexy and unbeatably fast, stealth ship 'Velocissimus'. Many a day we spent reducing the bastard's force who try and spoil all our fun. Our nemesis is The Purple Guard of Tharguss with all their rules and regulations, telling the galaxies what we can and can not do. They are the bane of my life, the despoilers of my fun and the reason I hate Purple.