How To Get Your New Kitten To Like You

LOVE ME KITTEN, LOVE ME!!!!

The joy and excitement that fills our souls, nay our entire being once we book the appointment to go and buy a kitten/cat is tantamount to . . . erm. . . the joy and excitement of booking an appointment to go and buy a puppy/dog, you get the drift.

You roll up to the kitten dealers house; a strange mixture of joy and trepidation hit you.  

What if the people don't like me?

What if they think I'm a cat killer?

What if it were all lies and I am going to be eaten by their insane budgie?

. . . and you thought I was joking!

Huh?

Don't ask me how, but when I take a certain journey on the underground, I always get lost.

I should perhaps start with a bit of disclosure usually referred to as “full” (although I’m not actually revealing all my innermost secrets, just one of the minor trivialities that make up my persona): I have no sense of direction whatsoever.